THE TRASH WAR

 

 

On the planet called Earth, in the aftermath of the war with the distant planet called T'ktro, two figures crept warily through the steaming streets of what used to be a big city. The tall one led the way, stealthily, there might still be a few of those hairy aliens lurking in the shadows behind fallen buildings. But all was deserted, the scene eerily quiet, so the two crept steadily on, the survivors searching for food.

 

They easily found the supermarket. Luckily it had not been touched by the devastation. Even some of the electric lights inside were still working. Abandoned cars stood hub-deep in the smoky mist that swirled away from the two as they crossed the parking lot. The store's automatic doors whooshed open, spilling a wave of stench of rotting produce and sour milk out over them.

 

"Phew!" said the shorter of the two. "Disgusting!"

 

"Just look for the cans," grumbled Tall.

 

They scanned the aisles, paper products, cosmetics in plastic bottles, video tapes, then Tall let out a low whistle. Before them were row-upon-row, up-to-the ceiling-almost stacks of cans.

 

"Hoo, brother, would you look at this! And it's ours, all ours," shouted Shorty, clapping his companion on the back. "But, hey..." He stopped, picked up a large can and tapped it thoughtfully. "How do we get these open?"

 

Tall's eyes rolled up to the ceiling. "Come on, vegetable-brain," he muttered, stomping away.

 

Two aisles over, they found the display of kitchen utensils. "Here," said Tall. "Try this." He handed Shorty a can-opener, then reached down and removed a small walkie-talkie from a clip at his waist.

 

"Wait!" said Shorty. "Before we call the others, let's have a little celebration...you know...winning the war and all." He lifted the can he'd brought with him up under Tall's nose.

 

Tall sniffed and closed his eyes. "Well," he said, "we really shouldn't, but..." He replaced the walkie-talkie on his waist clip. "Maybe just one can..."

 

He took the can and the can-opener from Shorty, removed the top and set it carefully aside. Shorty peered down into the can. "What's in there?" he asked with disgust.

 

Tall tipped the can slightly. "It says P E A C H E S I N H E A V Y S Y R U P." The two shrugged at each other. Tall turned the can upside down and poured the peaches out onto the floor...plop, plop. Then he began removing the bottom of the can.

 

"Um, hold on a second," said Shorty, as he reached up and gently poked a dangling wire back into Tall's blackened and empty left eye socket.

 

"Thanks," said Tall, wincing a little. "I'll be glad when they get the repair stations operational. Those lasers really tore us up." He nodded at the twisted mass of burned wires and circuitry that had been Shorty's right arm.

 

"Yeah," said Shorty, picking up the shiny round can top and taking a bite out of it. "You know," he went on, "I was feeling kind of bad about coming here, blowing things up, taking all this by force, but now I'm starting to think that those selfish 'humans' deserved everything they got. I mean, all this food just being wasted."

 

Tall nodded. "Huge dumping grounds full of food have been discovered all over the planet." He munched silently for a moment on the bottom of the can. "And you know what really gets me? That they lied to us when we requested food aid and said that there was widespread famine here. They had so much, and wouldn't even share it."

 

The End

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